Tag: healing process

• Rag Doll

  (October 27, 2011 9:27 pm est) I am tired of being your rag doll. I have spread myself far and wide for people who I could never say no to I have been a rag doll for many men A slave willingly offering my feminine sexuality Offering the opening of myself to be engulfed for nothing…

  Aya

  February 28, 2020

  Poems, Rants, Uncategorized

  alice miller, Alone, Artist, awakening, Bad Mother, beating, Being the oldest, child abuse, cinderella, courage to find yourself, Daughter of Narcissistic Mother, Evil, evil mother, Evil Parents, hatred towards parents, healing process, horrible step father, Narcissist, narcissistic mother, poems from daughters of narcissistic mothers, processing pain through your body, psychology, PTSD, rage, ritual abuse, sadness, sex addict parents, trauma

• Am I Dead?

  My dreams never came true Am I dead? My biggest shame. My biggest melt down in life. I have never come back from Something in me has given up For all time I suppressed this The thought ‘I minus well be a stripper’ because I felt that becoming an object of a man’s sexual desire…

  Aya

  September 12, 2012

  Healing My Own N-traits, My Childhood, Poems, Rants, Uncategorized

  abused, children, Growing up, healing process, honesty, hurt feelings, intuition, knowing yourself, narcissistic mother, poem, self healing, self-love, self-respect, True Self, trust, unloving mother

• Intimidation is a Trick, a Scandal, and a Lie

  My abuser used intimidation to make me feel like I wasn’t free.  It (the feeling of being intimidated) makes me turn away from approaching certain areas of myself inside my body. I feel a since of fight or flight whenever I feel like being happy, enjoying my day, being pretty, singing a song, being spontaneous,…

  Aya

  November 2, 2011

  My Childhood, Rants, Uncategorized

  Alone, anger, Artist, awakening, Bad Mother, beating, Being the oldest, change, child abuse, courage to find yourself, Daughter of Narcissistic Mother, Evil, Evil Parents, feeling like nobody cares, fucked up childhood, gaining love for yourself, Growing up, hatred towards parents, healing process, Hope, HSP’s, Individuation, inner space, Intimidation, sovereignty

• Rant #2

  I will never call you mother again. I spend most of my thought process thinking of you and why, and why, why would you, how could you, there is no way possible that someone could know what they were doing and kill a child’s spirit, courage, and will to live. Yes there is, you are…

  Aya

  October 31, 2011

  My Childhood, Rants

  Alone, anger, Artist, awakening, Bad Mother, beating, Being the oldest, child abuse, courage to find yourself, Daughter of Narcissistic Mother, Evil, Evil Parents, feeling like nobody cares, fucked up childhood, gaining love for yourself, healing process, HSP’s, Individuation, loss, narcissistic mother, PTSD, Standing up for yourself, trauma

• You Can’t Manipulate Life to get what you Want

  Growing up I was taught by watching my parents that how you manifest what you want is by trying to manipulate life.  Boy did they scheme, get rich quick plans, ice cream trucks, moving and shaking here and there, promotions at work and they were miserable. My step – father would talk about his dreams…

  Aya

  October 31, 2011

  How to Heal, My Childhood, Rants

  Alone, anger, Artist, awakening, Bad Mother, beating, Being the oldest, body focused healing, child abuse, courage to find yourself, Daughter of Narcissistic Mother, Evil, Evil Parents, feeling like nobody cares, healing process, Hope, Horrible Childhood, HSP’s, Human Psychology, Individuation, Isolation, loss, Love Yourself, Narcissist, PTSD, sex addict parents, Standing up for yourself, trauma